i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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