You're completely useless in the revolution.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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