so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
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