I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize