I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
My liver is preforming stress tests.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
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