Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
