In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
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I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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