I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
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