Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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