I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
I'm really busy with my period
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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