Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
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