I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
Randomize
