If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Never let your siblings swipe right.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Randomize
