She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
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