At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
You're earring is so big in my mouth
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
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