just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
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