I think I just saw someone hide a body.
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
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