How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
