I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
