hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
You ruined the universe
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Randomize