why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
found the other keg... it's in the tree
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Randomize
