If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Can I color on your dick again?
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
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