the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
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