last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize
