Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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