when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
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