I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
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