she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize
