he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
These People Are The Epitome of Lazy
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Disturbing Scenes People Witnessed As Children
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!