Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?