google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I made him laugh his dick is mine
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
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