You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
Randomize
