if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
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