I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize