I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
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