I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
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I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
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You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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