i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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