she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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