ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
