I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
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then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
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I think we need to teach you what straight means again
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
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