Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Randomize