She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
