Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
