Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
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you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
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What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
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