FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
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