ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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