I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
Randomize
