He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
only you would photoshop your dick
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Randomize
