is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
