5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize