why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Randomize
