Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
